Thursday, January 31, 2008
Permanent blogshift this time. never coming back.
http://marielleariel.tumblr.com
love!
Adieu 6:12 PM***
http://marielleariel.tumblr.com
love!
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
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"Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple
Sometimes good bye's the only way"
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im up.. at 4am.. high on coffee. thus here i am. having the spur of typing whatever that comes to my caffeine powered brain.
my life now.
Wake at 9am, school, eat, exercise, coffee, absorb as much info as possible into the oh-so-finite-mind-of-only-20-minutes span of attention, sleep at 4am.
i love my life.
Once in a while id deviate from this norm, to have a bit of spice to my now so study strickened life.
.....
Food for thought from what i realised in Lit and the Christian Child.
DID YOU KNOW?
Issac was 25 years old when abraham was tested to sacrfice him on the altar.
i had the image of issac being a small child not knowing what on earth was going on when his dad tied him and put him on a pile of firewood for no apparent reason.
For all you know, Issac climed onto the pile of wood himself to be sacrificed. Issac's like 25, and abraham was 124 years old?
how on earth was it possible for Abraham to CARRY issac ( a full grown adult btw) onto the altar??? Knocking Issac unconscious doesnt seem to be a very bright idea.. and keeping issac on the altar would be another major problem, him being 25 and all, issac could probably run away from being killed.
Thus i conclude from my new found info on issac, that he was a darn good martyr and son, or that he just so strongly believed he wouldnt die, he just willingly lay down in the presence of death, with the simple trust in God. i dont think abraham even needed to tie issac up.
oh so brave.. oh so charming.. oh so wise.
i sound so holy.
pfft i wish.
things of the past just intrigue me for some weird reason as much as me and history dont click.
-------
the static in winter is driving me and my hair crazy.
im getting electric shocks where ever i touch.
i feel like i have the power of electricity. once again, i wish.
If i did have that power, say goodbye to animal and child abusers and whoever i decide to electrocute. nah im not so evil. i think. then again u never know what power does to greedy, sinful, weak human souls now do we?
Static is in the air.
and im obviously under the influence of erm. caffeine. once again.
this is not good for my system honestly.
so long!
Went for a nice Swiss Chesse Fondue with pretty Miss Switzerland over at her place. The swiss fondue has WINE. which i didnt get drunk on. go me!
We walked about greek town, and got ourselves some cheese and spinich pies.
Then went to her place to ogle at cute international dudes on the net. (heh heh )
:D
After a filling dinner. off we went to meet yiwen and friend to catch the oh so charming johnny depp in the film Sweeney Todd -demon barber of fleet street.
musical+tim burton+ johnny depp= really good movie. really horrid. but really good.
Thus the previous entry.
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Adieu 3:47 AM***
We walked about greek town, and got ourselves some cheese and spinich pies.
Then went to her place to ogle at cute international dudes on the net. (heh heh )
:D
After a filling dinner. off we went to meet yiwen and friend to catch the oh so charming johnny depp in the film Sweeney Todd -demon barber of fleet street.
musical+tim burton+ johnny depp= really good movie. really horrid. but really good.
Thus the previous entry.
--------------
"this is the last time that I'm ever gonna give in tonight
are there angels or devils crawling here?
I just want to know what blurs and what is clear - to see "
-dishwalla-
Monday, January 28, 2008
"There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
And it's filled with people who are filled with shit
And the vermin of the world inhabit it..."
<3
Sunday, January 27, 2008
I wanna go to Stanford, Uni of Michigan, or Yale, Harvard maybe i'll think about it.
hahahhaa! omg.
try harder mel. try harder.
i think my GPA has to be 3.9 or 4.0 to get in.
i wanna go to grad school now and say hello to research papers and practicums at hospitals.
excited i am. and im only in second year.
i like to think a thad bit too much. :(
Adieu 4:16 AM***
hahahhaa! omg.
try harder mel. try harder.
i think my GPA has to be 3.9 or 4.0 to get in.
i wanna go to grad school now and say hello to research papers and practicums at hospitals.
excited i am. and im only in second year.
i like to think a thad bit too much. :(
Friday, January 25, 2008
"Perhaps I had a wicked childhood
Perhaps I had a miserable youth
But somewhere in my wicked, miserable past
There must have been a moment of truth
For here you are, standing there, loving me
Whether or not you should
So somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good
Nothing comes from nothing
Nothing ever could
So, somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good.. "
Perhaps I had a miserable youth
But somewhere in my wicked, miserable past
There must have been a moment of truth
For here you are, standing there, loving me
Whether or not you should
So somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good
Nothing comes from nothing
Nothing ever could
So, somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good.. "
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
im now living on caffine. :(
Monday, January 21, 2008
Maroussia left us... :( but we'll go skating again soon! not at -12 degrees though. with wind chill was like -22 degrees. my ears almost fell off.
i learnt abit of sweet techniques, but me being such a whimp, i think alan's ears were bursting at my sudden yelps of terror when i thought i might hit the ground. haha.
all in all.. a good day. good day. :)
Friday, January 18, 2008
Temporary shift to multiply for blogging.. check updates there.. reason being that i love the skin so much i wanna switch! HEH.
but.. once im bored. im shifting back.
http://marielleyap.multiply.com <--- CLICK.
Adieu 6:39 AM***
but.. once im bored. im shifting back.
http://marielleyap.multiply.com <--- CLICK.
Monday, January 14, 2008
the typical thing to do every new year..
RESOLUTIONS.
Adieu 3:39 PM***
RESOLUTIONS.
- pick up smoking.
- learn to get drunk. and not vomit.
- take drugs.
- try and curse 50 times in a day.
- over eat.
- not study and fail.
- tattoo my face.
IM KIDDING.
real resolutions 2008.
- study hard, try to get all As then get a scholarship.
- try my best not to loose my temper at mom. which is to love my mom more.
- get my scuba diving cert.
- climb mt bromo on a white horse.
- Exercise once a week at least.
- Get the job in the petshop.
- bond with my cousins. *wink at bao jie*
- Go to dubai and finally see my sis's abode, and of course see my sis.
- have first offical jamming session with "finger bang" (this is the temporary name, once again i think it sounds porno dudes, dont u think? YISHENG REPLY MY EMAIL, and i realised from johnny its from south park. -_-) and keep it serious.
- Volunteer in SPCA every morning to walk the dogs when im home during summer.
- buy all torey hayden books.
- Have an all dogs outing. dogs invited are stacy, well duh.. coco, ahpro, milo, horlick and the other coco, who else did i miss out? and other dogs. people that dont have dogs are welcomed! like joo, johnny, yisheng, huanxin and actually myself and boyfriend.
- see boyfriend race in the iron man thingy and ogle at his half naked hunky sweaty body. (heh heh)
Somebody's gonna scold me..
moving on.
Things i secretly feel like doing, well, not so secret anymore, in which i may or may not attempt to accomplish.
- Piercing my left cheek to get even with my dimples, then hide away for 4 months till the scar sets in.
- strip club for women. hey ho.
- play everyday at the sengkang playground (grace chris and huanxin, we all know which one im talking about! WEEE!)
- Watch all episodes of friends (hint hint to CHRIS) and south park.
- get another tatoo. i realise this is not so secretive, but then it doesnt really fit the category above because its not comfirmed, nor do i want to open a new category.
cheers to 2008!
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Pick out information that applies to you.. not all are to any particular person. so dont be senstive.
I think it was chris that said i was aunt agony. oh well.
many many MANY I SAY MANY people around me apparently aint doing well.. and ive heard it all.
Everyone has their own problems, everyone wants to be heard, everybody wants to be understood, everyone wants their voice heard, everyone is angry.
and nobody stops to think..
Everyone is misunderstood, everyone doesnt know how each one feels, everyone is hurt, everyone is scared, and everyone wants to be loved.
no one wants to be unhappy.
then why is everybody going all out to hurt each other. its just the weirdest shit ever.
Once the hurt is done, no amount of fighting, revenge or score settled will heal that bloody wound. The wound has to heal on its own.
see it this way, if a daughter is killed. murderer thrown in jail. would the mother feel any better? would the murderer being put in jail revive the daughter from the dead? the mom still has to heal on her own, the pain is still there.
Revenge done. then what happens next? you're just left on your own to hurt. its still the same outcome. nothing healed, nothing left. even your humanity is gone. revenge aint a pretty reflection.
and everybody says they love.... when no one understands anyone, no one is listening to anyone.
no one is RIGHT and no one is WRONG. everyone is the victim and everyone is the perpetrator, so why finger point?
im no angel at this, in fact, revenge is sooo my thing. but it doesnt work, hurting with words or threats doesnt work, it doesnt make things go my way, nor does it make me feel any better.
the only thing that works is when FINALLY AFTER 10 DAYS i stop thinking about myself and start thinking and imaginating about how the other person feels.
Take all the time in the world to heal, no one deserves pain. The heart will always heal if you let it.
If u refuse to want it to heal. then too bad.
....................
Love suffers long, and is kind... does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 corin 13:4-7)
No one said love was going to be easy, but no one said it was going to be impossible.
We all fail to realise that everyone else are human beings too. even i sometimes fail to realise that other people have feelings.
Adieu 4:33 PM***
I think it was chris that said i was aunt agony. oh well.
many many MANY I SAY MANY people around me apparently aint doing well.. and ive heard it all.
Everyone has their own problems, everyone wants to be heard, everybody wants to be understood, everyone wants their voice heard, everyone is angry.
and nobody stops to think..
Everyone is misunderstood, everyone doesnt know how each one feels, everyone is hurt, everyone is scared, and everyone wants to be loved.
no one wants to be unhappy.
then why is everybody going all out to hurt each other. its just the weirdest shit ever.
Once the hurt is done, no amount of fighting, revenge or score settled will heal that bloody wound. The wound has to heal on its own.
see it this way, if a daughter is killed. murderer thrown in jail. would the mother feel any better? would the murderer being put in jail revive the daughter from the dead? the mom still has to heal on her own, the pain is still there.
Revenge done. then what happens next? you're just left on your own to hurt. its still the same outcome. nothing healed, nothing left. even your humanity is gone. revenge aint a pretty reflection.
and everybody says they love.... when no one understands anyone, no one is listening to anyone.
no one is RIGHT and no one is WRONG. everyone is the victim and everyone is the perpetrator, so why finger point?
im no angel at this, in fact, revenge is sooo my thing. but it doesnt work, hurting with words or threats doesnt work, it doesnt make things go my way, nor does it make me feel any better.
the only thing that works is when FINALLY AFTER 10 DAYS i stop thinking about myself and start thinking and imaginating about how the other person feels.
Take all the time in the world to heal, no one deserves pain. The heart will always heal if you let it.
If u refuse to want it to heal. then too bad.
....................
Love suffers long, and is kind... does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 corin 13:4-7)
No one said love was going to be easy, but no one said it was going to be impossible.
We all fail to realise that everyone else are human beings too. even i sometimes fail to realise that other people have feelings.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Long christiany entry.. if not interested, dont read.
My whole purpose of wanting to leave singapore was 50% because of a vision i saw of myself in snow and the canadian flag some 3 years ago, and 50% was to RUN AWAY from things.
i must admit, im a good runner, from things i dont wanna face.. and it works fine with me.. i dont need to FACE MY PROBLEMS because they dont really haunt me anyways. call me a wuss, but at least im good at runnnig away.
And running away from everything, and flying half way across the globe, guess who accompanied me over? someone i never thought would do so.. GOD.
i should really start talking about God again. its been long since ive praised him and i'll praise him now.
i ran away, so to speak, from church because there were issues i didnt want and bother and dont see the need to debate about in my head. bottom line, i love God, if he doesnt love me back, its okay. as long as i love him. Then you christians might come and tell me, if i really love God, why would i leave church? if i SINCERELY LOVE HIM.. WHY??
answer is, i dunno.. hahaha.. pathetic right. i have my own belief system in me and my relationship with God can. He was my best friend since i was 5. so cut me some slack, heh. i really cant say my love for God is like INTENSE AND ALL EMOTIONAL. its more of lighthearted joking and talking about random stuff. if u know me, you'd probably guessed it was something like that anyway.
people say, we'd run to God when bad things happen. well.. im running to him now because I FEEL SO BLESSED TO THE POINT I DONT BELIEVE HE IS NOT WITH ME. because he is!! God doesnt like to leave me, and everyone else as well, even if u are as whimpy as me, God always sticks around hoping to find a way to lift you up!
God has overdone it this time. my heart feels so happy, its growing so big it would float away.
id never be able to do this without YOU! okay i give SOME credit to myself, but even im not believing what i see.
:)
Adieu 11:22 AM***
My whole purpose of wanting to leave singapore was 50% because of a vision i saw of myself in snow and the canadian flag some 3 years ago, and 50% was to RUN AWAY from things.
i must admit, im a good runner, from things i dont wanna face.. and it works fine with me.. i dont need to FACE MY PROBLEMS because they dont really haunt me anyways. call me a wuss, but at least im good at runnnig away.
And running away from everything, and flying half way across the globe, guess who accompanied me over? someone i never thought would do so.. GOD.
i should really start talking about God again. its been long since ive praised him and i'll praise him now.
i ran away, so to speak, from church because there were issues i didnt want and bother and dont see the need to debate about in my head. bottom line, i love God, if he doesnt love me back, its okay. as long as i love him. Then you christians might come and tell me, if i really love God, why would i leave church? if i SINCERELY LOVE HIM.. WHY??
answer is, i dunno.. hahaha.. pathetic right. i have my own belief system in me and my relationship with God can. He was my best friend since i was 5. so cut me some slack, heh. i really cant say my love for God is like INTENSE AND ALL EMOTIONAL. its more of lighthearted joking and talking about random stuff. if u know me, you'd probably guessed it was something like that anyway.
people say, we'd run to God when bad things happen. well.. im running to him now because I FEEL SO BLESSED TO THE POINT I DONT BELIEVE HE IS NOT WITH ME. because he is!! God doesnt like to leave me, and everyone else as well, even if u are as whimpy as me, God always sticks around hoping to find a way to lift you up!
God has overdone it this time. my heart feels so happy, its growing so big it would float away.
id never be able to do this without YOU! okay i give SOME credit to myself, but even im not believing what i see.
:)
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
Okay.. i will not take credit for these photos.. photos are by yiwen.. apparently she takes really ARTSY TALENTED PHOTOS but REFUSES to go take up a degree in photography and rather take PHILOSOPHY because the TA is CUTE. tsk tsk. (okay i lied a tinsy bit)
Its so weird how words have meanings, and then those meanings get attached to bodies, and then dehumanises people, to mere nothingness other than the social conception of that word.
There's more to every person.Everybody is someone.
Adieu 1:14 PM***
I apologise for the extremely huge ass photos. i didnt adjust them well cos its not from my cam and im too lazy to DELETE and upload again. :) all the better to see the talented work of my dear friend..
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"Jehovah here of Nothing, all things makes,
And Man chief of all, his God forsakes.
Yet by th'Almighty Mercy twas decreed,
Heaven's Heir should satisfie for Man's misdeed."
-taken from Verbum Sempiternum-
Its so weird how words have meanings, and then those meanings get attached to bodies, and then dehumanises people, to mere nothingness other than the social conception of that word.
There's more to every person.
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
i love my new course!!!
its literature and the christian child.
and these are the books i have to read.
Adieu 1:29 AM***
its literature and the christian child.
and these are the books i have to read.
- the water babies by charles kingsley.
- The Princess and the Goblin by george macdonald
- The lion the witch and the wardrobe by C.S lewis
- A wrinkle in time by madeleine l'engle
- Bridge to terabithia by katherine paterson
- The fire eaters by david almond
- Harry Potter and the deathly hallows by J.K rowling.
COOL OR WHAT!!
and then we'd go into the debates about the big issue about christians wanting to BAN HARRY POTTER and stuff like that.
and of course there's the medieval part to it, where there's the various versions of the bible, poems, and catechetical stuff... where kids had to read material like "you'll burn in hell and die if you steal or not listen to your parents" sort of "novels".
joo you'll love this course!!
oh im so happy!
Monday, January 07, 2008
School starts tmr....
oh a happier note... i recieved this.
Thanks love. :)
i tearded.
i miss you!
Adieu 6:15 AM***
oh a happier note... i recieved this.
Thanks love. :)
i tearded.
i miss you!
Friday, January 04, 2008
Tons of photos. more to come.
yiwen- dont kill me for the butt photo. haha! you have embarrassing photos of me as well. :)
i love running around in freezing whether and snow!
